There is currently only one planet in retrograde:
Your Nerdy, Hippie, Science-y Horoscope
Alright, fellow space cadets, let's strap in for this cosmic rollercoaster ride! First up, we've got Mercury in Capricorn. Now, if you're feeling like your life is more confusing than trying to understand the plot of 'Inception', don’t panic! It’s just Mercury flipping its vibe on us, turning retrograde. This could mean your communication might be as effective as sending smoke signals in a windstorm. But it’s cool, just remember to double-check your texts before hitting send, okay? #MercuryMadness
Moving on, Venus is chilling in Sagittarius, the zodiac's adventurous archer. If you've recently found yourself developing an odd attraction to people who can't stay in one place (I’m not talking about those irritating fidget spinners), thank Venus for that. This planet of love in Sagittarius might have you swiping right on every travel blogger you come across. #WanderlustLove
Now, Mars is sharing a room with Pluto in Capricorn, which is kind of like putting two toddlers in a playpen and expecting them to share toys. If you're feeling a bit more aggressive than usual, blame these two. Just remember, when dealing with people, you catch more flies with honey than vinegar. Unless you’re planning to rule the world, then carry on. #MarsPlutoMashup
Jupiter is hanging out in Taurus – and we all know how much Taurus loves the finer things in life. So, if you've been feeling an inexplicable desire to splurge on that 24k gold plated pizza cutter, it's Jupiter's fault. #TaurianTemptations
Saturn in Pisces is like a strict teacher trying to supervise a fish tank filled with guppies. If you’re feeling a little more introspective and serious than usual, or maybe even a tad wet behind the ears, it’s just Saturn trying to impose some order on Pisces' dreamy chaos. #SaturnSchoolsPisces
Uranus is twinning with Jupiter in Taurus. Now, Uranus is the rebel of the solar system. So if you suddenly feel like liberating all the lawn gnomes in your neighborhood, don't say I
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